On being suicidal “Poem”

I have been suicidal so many nights being unable to close my eyes suffering from Insomnia

Some nights reading and writing helps some nights it don’t

Tonight I had to do some push ups to let my Angst and temptations go

I often think if there would have been no philosophy what would have became of me?

I might have been dead long time ago

On reading the writers who shared the same views is such a delight like Descartes, Camus and many more

Without Literature my existence would have no meaning

Without reading what I have to before starting the day I wouldn’t have passed a single day pleasantly

At the end one knows what counts is ones own humanity

There were times I used to write essays on suicide for my assignments shocking professors

Never have thought such ideas can come back haunting in middle of nights

For life in midst of struggle and pain is a lonely walk

I am breathing with the help I get from books on my table only

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